


When the job is done

by solrosan



Series: Queensman [9]
Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Eggsy Unwin as Merlin, F/M, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Pick a Puppy, Post-Canon, Prince Eggsy Unwin, Rebuilding, rebuilding kingsman
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:28:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28453128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/solrosan/pseuds/solrosan
Summary: Being Merlin isn't just yelling at new recruits and helping Arthur pick out new wall paper for the mansion -- or for that matter spending disproportional amounts of time at the kennel with the puppies. Being Merlin also means sending agents out in the field, and sometimes they don't come back.Even if Eggsy deep down knows that, he's not prepared for the reality of it.
Relationships: Harry Hart | Galahad & Gary "Eggsy" Unwin, Tilde/Gary "Eggsy" Unwin
Series: Queensman [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/881964
Comments: 12
Kudos: 23





	When the job is done

Eggsy tore off his headset and threw it to the side. Winded, and with his heart beating hard as if he had been running a marathon, he stared at the feed from Percival’s glasses as they kept transmitting even though Percival lay almost face down in the dirt.

Breathe in. Out. In. Out. In…

He reached for the headset again. He didn’t put it on, just held it up to one ear.

“Gabriel?” he said, knowing full well that his agent didn’t hear him but refusing to accept it just yet. “Gabbie? Percy? Please?”

The line was dead. His agent was… was also dead. The realisation turned his insides to ice. The world stood still, just as the glasses’ feed he couldn’t tear his eyes from. In the corner of the screen he could see flames from the explosion. 

Eggsy put down the headset, gently this time. There were actions he needed to take, but he didn’t know what they were right now. In an attempt to focus, he pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes and leaned against the desk.

Shit.

He took a couple of deep breaths as purple and orange spots started to appear behind his closed eyelids. Okay, so. Where to start? He knew this. They had talked about it. He just needed to focus. What was the protocol? What was the first step? 

The mission. 

The mission. The mission, the mission, the mission. 

That was the first step. Secure the mission. The world wouldn’t implode if nothing was done today. He could redirect Oscar, he was almost updated on the situation. 

Step two, then. Gabriel. Or rather, Percival. He needed to deal with the dead Kingsman agent before he could deal with the actual person. 

Eggsy looked up from his hands and stared at the transmission again. He had sent out Percival with glasses, a signet ring, two handguns, a biometric watch, and five lighter grenades. Nothing highly incriminating if he just turned off the tracing on the glasses.

He started to record a log of the transmission, making sure he had the coordinates and other metadata properly logged. Then he put on the headset, knowing it was stupid and unnecessary and just wrong what he was about to do.

“Gabriel,” he said softly, “I’m going to turn these off now. I’m sorry. Will try to get you home. Promise.”

Then he terminated the feed and broke the connection. The screen went black. It became so, so quiet. That saying about a deafening silence was true. They did exist. 

He slid his chair away from the blacked-out screen, turned his back to it, and picked up a secure line by the press of a button.

“Welcome to Statesman Whiskey Inc. Our opening hours are--”

“Merlin here, I need to talk to Ginger,” Eggsy said, drawing a blank on what he was actually supposed to say to be put through. 

The recording stopped with a click, there was a soft white noise before a woman said, “One moment.”

“Ginger Ale,” said a man a moment later.

“Hi, Simon, it’s Eggsy.”

“Eggsy! Pleasure.”

“Mm,” was all Eggsy had to say about that. He missed Elisabeth, but she was a field agent now and he wouldn’t want to take that away from her. “I need help extracting a body.”

Eggsy heard Simon stop typing on his keyboard. 

“Who?”

“Percival.”

“Shit, I’m sorry.”

“I’m sending over the coordinates and mission details so you know what you’re walking into.”

“Thanks. Sorry to ask, but what state is he in?”

Eggsy swallowed. He knew why Simon asked, he wanted to know what type of crew he should send and what he would supply them with. He looked back at the screens where he had been following Gabriel’s mission.

“I don’t know,” he replied. “He got caught in an explosion, took it in the back. The place was on fire when I killed the feed.”

“Got it. Do you need extra resources for whatever he was working on? I think Gin could be briefed and deployed in about seven hours.”

“No, I think we’re fine there. Gawain can take it.”

“Check. I’ll coordinate and send you the extraction plan when I’m done.”

“Thanks, mate.”

“Don’t mention it. And Eggsy… I’m so sorry.”

“I… yeah, thank you.” Eggsy sighed deeply. “I need to deal with the rest. Ring me if you have any questions or updates, yeah?”

“Of course. Take care.”

After they had hung up, Eggsy sat staring into space for a good five minutes before kicking himself into gear again. Calling Simon might have been premature, but he couldn’t leave this room without knowing that someone was coming for Gabriel. 

He found Harry where he always was these days, behind the desk in his office. In the years since he returned, Harry had become a first class administrator (and Eggsy suspected politician). It had visibly aged him, but he didn’t seem to mind. 

“Eggsy?”

“Arthur,” said Eggsy, nodding once.

Harry frowned, sitting up straighter. He nodded once too. “Merlin.”

Eggsy chewed on his lip, his hands balled into fists and so very, very grateful that Harry took his cue to distance them both from this conversation. 

“We’ve lost Percival.”

Harry’s jaw tightened and he briefly looked down before meeting Eggsy’s eyes again. 

“I have terminated the glasses and requested the Statesmen to help us retrieve the body -- if there’s one to retrieve once they get there. The place was on fire and…”

Eggsy’s voice trailed off as Harry took off his glasses and rubbed the scar over his left eye socket, his lips twisting as if he was in pain. They hadn’t tried to get Harry’s body back and for as long as Eggsy was Merlin, he wouldn’t leave an agent in the field if he could help it.

“Do we have a handle on it, the mission I mean?” asked Harry when he put his glasses back on.

Eggsy nodded. “Yes. I think Gawain can pick it up if I just give him a proper briefing.”

“Well, then… We’ll do that today and then we inform the other two tomorrow.” With a sigh, Harry got up. He walked over where he kept his liquor and poured two glasses of Statesman whiskey, giving one to Eggsy. “To Percival.”

Eggsy took the glass. It all happened so fast. Too fast. It wasn’t even five minutes since he had terminated the feed and now they were raising a glass to the fallen agent. They were little without their traditions, though. Harry had said so more than once during their work to rebuild this organization and Tilde kept reminding him about it a lot when it came to his day job. Traditions were important.

As Eggsy brought the glass to his mouth he remembered sitting at a long, empty table in a wine cellar. It gave him pause and he lowered the glass without drinking. His hand trembled and his eyes burned -- his predecessor had trained three of the agents killed that night. Three! And Lancelot before that. And his dad… Fuck. 

“Merlin?” asked Harry.

Eggsy followed through and took half the whisky in one go without looking at Harry.

“We’ll continue the recruitment as planned and put Percival at the, at the end. Sound okay?” he said. “Or we’ll start taking two at the time, it’s going too slow. We can’t--”

“Merlin, go home. It’s an order. I’ll deal with the practical until morning.”

Eggsy nodded. He emptied his glass without a word and left. Two steps outside the door he turned around and went back in. Harry was just about to pour himself another whisky. 

“Did you forget so--” he started, but cut himself short in surprise when Eggsy hugged him. 

“Fuck,” Eggsy mumbled against Harry’s suit.

Harry hugged him back without a word.

* * *

Eggsy had ended up disobeying Harry’s order. It just wasn’t practical (or realistic) for Merlin to go home when an agent had died on a mission. Harry understood, but he had insisted on being in the room when Gawain was briefed. It hadn’t been pretty, but at least Gawain was on his way now and Simon had texted to let Eggsy know Cognac was on his way to get Gabriel.

Harry dropped Eggsy off outside his home just after eleven that evening. Gawain would touch ground in eight hours, so there was no reason for Eggsy to not get some sleep. Or so Harry said.

As soon as Eggsy opened the door, J.B. came running towards him. Eggsy got down to greet him. 

“Hey, boy,” he mumbled as J.B. licked his face. “What are you doing up so late?”

He tipped backwards, sitting down properly on the floor with his back against the door. He didn’t care what Merlin had said -- or what he told the recruits these days -- this was why they had the dogs, to have someone to come home to after a shit day. 

When J.B. finally gave up, barking brightly once and taking a few steps into the house before turning to see why his human didn’t follow, Eggsy realised that he had to take care of Gabriel’s dog as well. It was a English beagle named Caspian. He wondered if Tilde would allow him to adopt him, knowing deep down that he would do it no matter what she said.

With huge effort, Eggsy managed to get up on his feet to follow J.B. to the kitchen. He had promised Harry to at least have a sandwich before bed and that felt just uncomplicated enough for him to handle. Bread, butter, pastrami -- and a bit for J.B. -- it all went on autopilot. 

As did calling Tilde as soon as he had his hands free again. 

It didn’t take long for her to pick up, and seeing her face on the screen made him ache. She was in bed, her pyjamas and reading glasses on. It became painfully clear how much he missed having her here, having her close. He needed her embrace more than he had in years.

“Hi,” he whispered, a huge lump in his throat, moving to sit down at the kitchen table.

“Babe? What’s-- what’s wrong? What’s happened?”

He shook his head, vainly rubbing tears from his eyes. 

“What do you need?”

“Can you just… can we just sit here?”

“Sure. Do you want me to tell you about my day?”

Eggsy nodded. He knew she had been to her old school today which always got her in a good mood. She loved meeting kids. 

In the middle of her retelling he suddenly blurted out, “I’m taking in a new dog.”

Tilde paused. “Okay.”

“His name’s Caspian and he’s already trained and everything.”

“Okay.”

Eggsy nodded. He felt his throat closing up and he couldn’t get another word out.

“Eggsy,” said Tilde softly, “is Caspian’s someone’s J.B.?”

He nodded again, wiping tears that started to run down his cheeks again. “Percival’s.”

“Oh, babe, I’m so sorry.”

He hid his face in his hand as it broke for him. At some point he dropped his phone on the table and he covered his face with both hands. He wasn’t new to this. He was all too familiar with Kingsman agents dying -- both on and off the job -- but this was different. This was _his_ agent dying. He had trained Gabriel. He had _picked_ him. He had _sent him to his death_.

When he had calmed down some, he found his phone again. Tilde looked wrecked and Eggsy didn’t want to think about what a mess he had to look like himself. 

“Sweetheart,” she whispered.

“I miss you.”

“Do you want me to come?”

He nodded.

“I can be there at four tomorrow, is that all right?”

Eggsy blinked. “What? Don’t you have a… something?”

“You’re more important.”

“No, really, I--”

“Your mental health is more important. You’re more important. If you want me to come, I’ll come. Do you want me to come?”

Eggsy nodded again. “Yes.”

“Give me 15 minutes to fix all of it and then I’ll call you back, okay?”

“Okay.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Tilde smiled before hanging up. Eggsy sighed. He felt calmer, if not better, and decided to brush his teeth before Tilde called him back.

* * *

The chairs scraped against the floor as Lancelot and Tristan got up to leave. They looked shocked and pale by the news that not only was Percival dead, but Gawain had already taken his place in the field. Eggsy stood to the left of Harry’s chair at the top of the table, watching them leave. This wasn’t a Kingsman tradition that he had hoped to share with them, but it did give him a clear understanding of what Merlin had told him the ruins of the shop all those years ago. When it’s all done, you can shed a tear in private. There was no time for personal feelings when you had to send out new people to clean up after the dead.

It became eerily quiet after the door closed. Harry broke the silence with a deep sigh. 

“That was that,” he said, slumping in his chair. He pointed at the chair both he and Eggsy had once occupied during Table meetings, inviting him to sit down. “Do we know what’s next?”

Eggsy remained standing.

“I need to get back down to Gawain,” said Eggsy, pretending to read off the tablet in his hand. “I’m waiting to hear from Ginger about how it goes for Cognac. And this afternoon is the second round on the obstacle course for the recruits.” 

“Merlin, sit.”

“Talk to Ms Toffee like that, do you?”

“No, she’s a good dog.”

“What happened to my dad’s dog?” asked Eggsy, pulling out the chair to sit down.

Harry frowned. “I don’t know. He probably went back to the kennel like the ones for the eliminated recruits.” 

“Right. Makes sense.”

“Why?”

“Just realised I never knew.”

“He was a terrier of some kind -- Welsh or Irish, I think, I don’t remember. He called him Ham. I thought it was a ridiculous name for a dog, but it made more sense when I met you.”

Eggsy couldn’t help laughing. “You’re fucking with me.”

Harry smiled. “Yes, his name was Riker after some Star Trek character.”

“My dad liked Star Trek?”

“I’m fairly sure both he and James hoped this was some secret space program at times.”

Harry smiled fondly at the memory, while Eggsy’s slowly faded. What if he’d got a dog with a geeky name to remember his dad by rather than a medal? Not that he and his mum would have been any good at looking after it back then, but what if...

“I’m going to adopt Caspian,” he said. “Gabriel’s dog.”

“Is that wise?”

Eggsy sighed deeply. “Probably not, but I’m still doing it. Tilde says it’s fine.”

“Then I’m not going to argue.”

“I have to do _something_.”

“I know.”

Eggsy forced a tired smile. He knew he couldn’t take in every dog of every agent who died, that couldn’t be the protocol. Yet he couldn’t phantom establish a protocol about what to do with the dogs if their agents died, because he couldn’t let any more of them die. Which he deep down knew he had very little power over.

“Do you ever stop blaming yourself?” he asked.

Harry looked at him for a long time, then he shook his head. “No.”

“Wrong fucking answer, Harry,” Eggsy mumbled, as he got up. “Wrong fucking answer.”

* * *

They decided -- Harry and Tilde decided -- that Harry would be the one going to Leeds to talk to Gabriel's parents. Most people might not recognise the Prince of Sweden in England, but it was an unnecessary risk to take. Eggsy, who really felt that it should be him breaking these news to them, was deep down relieved that he didn’t have to do it. 

Instead Eggsy spent his days monitoring Gawain and trying to make sure the candidates for the Kay position were kept on their toes, and his nights wandering around his house until he realised he had to wake Tilde because he felt like he was suffocating.

He felt like shit for doing it, but the only thing she ever said when he apologised was that he should have woken her sooner. 

He felt like shit for all the things she cancelled to be here. The Court had even put out a statement saying that the Crown princess had taken some time off due to mental health reasons. Her mental health. Not the mess of a husband she had who tried to play spymaster as a secondary career.

At least J.B. and Caspian got along.

* * *

“I’ve made some changes to the recruitment schedule you suggested,” said Harry and handed Eggsy his tablet. 

Gawain had just left the room after giving an oral summary of the mission. Eggsy felt as if he could finally breathe again when his agent was back with nothing worse than a split lip and a few bruises.

“You think we should do Percival after we’ve done Kay?” Eggsy asked, feeling very sceptical as he took the tablet. “I’m not sure I’m comfortable with that.”

“No, I think we should pause the agents all together. If at the end of this round we have a Kay we’ll have four field agents and if you’re comfortable with it, I see no problem taking Ector out of this group as well. Then we’ll have five competent -- if inexperienced -- agents. And just one handler.”

Eggsy finally glanced down at the tablet which contained a list of open positions. Handlers, therapists, more medical personnel and IT-people… support staff all of them.

“I’ve asked Whiskey to come over and help you with recruitments and training. You need to start building your own organisation and not kill yourself staffing mine.”

“Trying to take my agents from me?” said Eggsy, only half-joking. 

“Can’t take what’s already mine.”

“If that’s what you want to think, Arthur…” Eggsy mumbled, scrolling through the different positions Harry thought it necessary to hire. It all looked sound. They had talked a lot about it, but the focus had always been on the agents. You don’t need support staff if you have no organisation to support.

“I do,” said Harry. “I also think that you should start training your successor.”

Eggsy glanced up at him. “Giving me my notice, are you?”

“We’re half-way round the table and your father-in-law turns 80 soon.”

“Mm.” Eggsy handed the tablet back to him. “I’ve actually started talking to Sebastian about it. It’s not all bad having been in the field when ordering people about out there.”

Harry nodded. “I think so too. Is Sebastian interested?”

“I don’t know, he hasn’t said ‘no’ but…”

“But it’s hard saying no to your mentor.”

“In certain areas, yes,” said Eggsy, a smile teasing at the corners of his mouth. “I’m getting better at it.”

“Unfortunately.” 

“Not going to say no to this, though.” Eggsy nodded at the tablet. “But we’re getting at least one therapist before I start to train handlers.”

“I’ve already hired one,” said Harry, taking a folded note out of his pocket and handing it to Eggsy. On it was a time and an address. “Your first appointment is the day after tomorrow and I expect you to keep it.”

“I will.” Eggsy nodded and put the note in his pocket. “When’s yours?”

“Tomorrow.”

**Author's Note:**

> See! I haven't forgotten about this verse! I hope you enjoyed this part too!
> 
> (Also, as a fandom, can we please use "Rebuilding Kingsman" and "Pick a Puppy" enough to make them searchable? ;D They are GOOD tags people, come on!)


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